The Start Of My Story

Aurora

I couldn’t take it anymore. Before I knew what I was doing, I was already standing up and opening the drawer. Pulling out the heart-shaped box. Tearing open the tin lid. I had never noticed how red the box was, blood red. Inside the box was the shining blade of steel that had beckoned me. I traced my finger around its sharp edge, giggling to myself. Isn’t this funny? Look what the supposedly great, calm, and sane girl has resorted to. Like no one saw this coming. I laughed again, louder and harder this time. Then I became serious. It was time. I reached into the tin and pulled out the knife. I watched as it glinted in the green glow of my lava lamp. Slowly, as if in a dreamy trance, I lifted the blade and dragged it across the thin skin of my wrist. Gently at first, because I was scared. Then harder, leaving a fine line of the crimson elixir that kept me living. It slowly grew larger and began dripping down my arm as I held it up for examination. A cruel smile slid across my face. I couldn’t help it, I made another cut. I kept going, making the wounds smaller and smaller as I went down my arm. The rush was amazing as I felt the adrenaline course throughout my body. Then words began flashing through my head like a movie on fast-forward:
Regret
Pain
Inconsiderate
Guilty
Fear
Help
Uncontrollable
STOP!
Hot tears rushed down my face as I dropped the knife.
What had I done?